


I am of the forest

by Kylpyvene



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Angst, Could count as hurt/comfort at times, ForestSpirit-au, I'm just having fun, M/M, Possibly unsettling content, There might be angst in the future
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-12 10:01:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29008716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kylpyvene/pseuds/Kylpyvene
Summary: Jon is a forest spirit who happens to find a human in his forest, and they become travel buddies. Chaos ensues.
Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist
Comments: 15
Kudos: 58





	1. Chapter 1

Jon had never been a big fan of humans. They were just irritating. Never cleaning after themselves. Never looking where they were going and what they ruined. What they broke. Things left dead in their wake. Jon was never cruel to them, that wasn’t in his nature. He just observed them, that was more his nature. He tried not to show himself to them, it wasn’t needed for humans to know he was there, staring and listening to them. Humans were also so often blind to the likes of his. So many times he watched them barrel through some smaller spirit’s home and not even notice. He always shook his head so sadly when that happened. His magic wasn’t much help in those events. 

Jon wasn’t expecting company at that time. He had hoped that the nearness of midsummer would drive humans out of the roads through the forest. He had not expected to find a young human man in the forest with him. He had just been walking, he needed to get somewhere and trying to traverse the spirit land at that time of the year was no help, he would just get lost and end up spending weeks on a few days trip. So he had packed his bags and taken the road, walking calmly through the high trees. And after he had stopped to eat some of the snacks he had packed for the trip, a young man had wandered out of the forest, looking disheveled and confused, like he was totally lost. The stranger looked around panicked, but seemed to relax as his eyes brushed over Jon, who cursed in his mind. The stranger walked towards him. 

“Hi! Can you help me? I think I got lost and don’t really know where I am now?” he stumbled over his words a bit while looking at Jon, who just sat under a tree. Jon slowly finished eating his mouthful before answering as politely as he could muster: 

“This road leads to the town and later to the city.” Jon said, unhelpfully. The stranger just blinked a few times. 

“Yes, but uh... what town? What city?” he asked. Jon could hear the panic and fear from his voice. Suppose the man wasn’t as used to being in a forest and how to not get lost in them. You could never panic, if you got lost. 

“The town is named Raingrove. The nearest city is Elkburg.” 

“Right. Going to be honest, I doubt I’ve ever heard of those... I’m still very lost. You. You uh wouldn’t mind showing me the way to the town?” the stranger asked hopefully. Jon sighed. Technically helping the lost was his job at times. He wished it wasn’t. He didn’t want to be near humans. 

“I am on the way to the town, you can come with me. It's not quite close, might take a day or two to walk there, but as long as you have equipment”, he raised his brows. “You should be fine. I am Jon, by the way.” He felt it was only polite to introduce himself. The man blinked, then offered his hand, which Jon took carefully. He was surprised by how soft it was. 

“Martin, I am Martin!” he announced, now very much relieved. Jon nodded, wrapped his food up again and got up. 

“Pleasure”, he said coldly. He then beckoned Martin to follow him as he started to walk the well trodden path towards Raingrove. Maybe he would get rid of the man there. Further he would not take him. He had his own business to do. 

They had walked in silence for a bit, when the questions started. Martin didn’t seem to be able to handle the deafening silence of the quiet forest with no other noices than their breathing and footsteps. 

“So, where are you headed?” he asked casually. 

“Elkburg. I have business to do near there”, Jon simply answered. 

“Right. This close to midsummer, business? And uh well. You don’t look the business type”, Martin said lightheartedly, which almost made Jon roll his eyes. Of course Jon wouldn’t tell a human what his actual business in Elkburg was, how was that any of their worry. 

“I have my reasons. Of course I’m not decked out in my best clothes when I’m walking for days in a forest. What about you, where you headed and why?” he tried his best to change the subject. Martin blushed a bit at that. 

“I... I’m going to start a job. In Elkburg. We can maybe go together that far? It would be nice to have a trustworthy walk buddy.” Jon wanted to roll his eyes, again. Who was to say he was trustworthy at all. Martin continued talking, about his family and the job he had managed to get, how excited he was, how he hoped everything went well. Jon couldn’t help smiling at that. He had always found humans kind of adorable in that way. They had their jobs and money and hurries and they never just sat down and existed for moments without any need to be somewhere or someone, they never heard the trees sing. They lived such short lives and they just. Worried and hurried and never truly lived. It was sad but adorable, how much meaning humans found in their meaningless existence. They could never see the trees they planted reach the sky, like Jon could. Like he could see empires rise and fall, forests fall to dust. 

At the end of the day Jon knew maybe more about Martin than he would have liked to, but he had to admit, that Martin didn’t seem too bad as a human. He seemed nice enough, caring and sweet. Jon wished silently, as he prepared their camp, that more humans were like Martin. His job would be so much easier that way.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's just them walking and talking.

Martin was very thankful for Jon. He would have spent the rest of his day, quite possibly the rest of his life wandering the forests lost with no hope of getting out. He had felt so relieved to see another human in the forest and was even more glad it had been Jon. 

Of course he had noticed the annoyance in the another man. He wasn’t stupid – or blind for that matter. He had seen the eyerolls, it had not made him feel great about himself, but Jon had allowed him to join him and he was grateful. He could have just as easily have told Martin that he couldn’t come with him, told him that he didn’t need the extra burden of Martin, but he had graciously been almost nice to Martin. 

For a moment, as he had stumbled onto the road and seen Jon, Martin had been filled with all consuming fear. His eyes had locked onto Jon, who had just sat there and he had been so afraid. For a second, his brain didn’t believe Jon was human. He had been so afraid that he had crossed over to the fae world and Jon would kill him – or worse. Even now something about Jon made his brain feel uneasy. 

Jon was beautiful. That had been the second thing Martin had noticed, as soon as his fears had subsided a little. He was shorter than Martin, but beautiful. There wasn’t exactly anything unusual about Jon, he was dressed modestly, he had long, dark hair and a beard, but that seemed to highlight his face. Maybe the thing that stood out about most was his eyes. They were green, almost ridiculously bright and deep. Martin had looked into them a few times, but immediatly felt like he shouldn’t be looking into them, lest he get lost. 

Martin had never met someone who fit somewhere as well as Jon fit into the forest. He seemed to somehow be so at home as he walked the uneven path. From time to time he chuckled or smiled a little, he would turn his head. Martin would catch him almost listening to something but Martin never heard anything. He had started to fill the empty space of them just walking with talking, questions, but he quickly found that Jon wasn’t too interested in answering questions, so he had just started to tell stories and some things about himself. At times something he said, or some bit of the story made Jon smile, or laugh a little, which Martin found kind of adorable. It wasn’t even necessarily things he thought of funny, just normal things. Every smile though made him feel a bit lightheaded, or maybe it was the trecking through the forest. He wanted to make Jon smile more, for some reason. 

Darkness had started to slowly creep into the forest, when Jon walked off the path, which slightly panicked Martin. That's how he had gotten himself lost. 

“Uh, Jon? Where are you going?” he tried to control the trembling of his voice. 

“We can’t exactly camp on the road”, came Jon’s calm answer. Martin saw no reason for why not, but he made the decision to follow Jon into the forest. It didn’t long to find a small opening in the trees and a perfect, small, moss covered part of the forest looked like it was made for staying the night. Jon had already started to unpack some of his things. Martin put his bags on the ground as well and sat down. 

“How did you know this was here?” Martin asked. He was tired and hungry, but the silence felt too judging for him. Jon just gave him a puzzling look before answering. 

“I’ve gone by this before.” If it had been anyonone else, Martin would have doubted they remembered the exact spot of the forest where there was a perfect opening to rest, but somehow, because it was Jon, it made sense. Though was it just Martin or did Jon answer everything awfully cryptidly? 

Jon was quick to set up a campfire and make a bed for himself, as Martin dug some of his food and started to eat. He felt a bit bad for not helping, but he wasn’t exactly too good with camping stuff. And Jon seemed to be glad to be allowed to work by himself rather than having to be wary of Martin. As he was finished, he dug out a map and walked over to Martin. 

“I’m just going to show you the way we will be going”, Jon stated and opened the map. It was very beautiful. It was just a map, but it seemed crafted with much love, and the writing was in a very neat handwriting. The map had some places, markings and writing, that Martin had never seen and couldn’t read. 

“We are approximately here”, Jon said and pointed towards a part of the forest. How he would know that was beyond Martin. “We are heading towards Raingrove, there. We should arrive tomorrow evening at this pace. There you can get more concrete advice on how to get to Elkburg. It's this big one here”, Jon continued and pointed to a big spot next to the ocean, where indeed, Martin could see the words Elkburg written on the map. The way Jon was talking made it seem like he was planning on continuing without Martin. 

“You were heading there too? How are you going?” Martin couldn’t stop himself asking, which he immediatly regretted, when he visibly saw Jon tense. 

“I- I plan on walking. I enjoy taking my time making it through the forest”, he said quietly. 

“I could walk with you... I mean if that’s alright with you? I wouldn’t want to force it but...”, Martin trailed off. He could hear Jon sigh a bit and nod then. 

“Sure. I'm not in too much hurry though, so I might not be walking too much every day.” That was fine with Martin. His job was agreed to start in two weeks time, so they would have time. Plenty and more. 

“How do you have such a nice a map?” Martin asked. He wanted to talk with Jon more. 

“Oh I uhm... I made it?” That was surprisint to Martin, but it just made so much more interesting to him than he had been before. 

“Really? You knew how to make an accurate map just like that?” Martin was actually impressed. 

“No, my father taught me. Im a cartographer and a... well I guess you could use the word scholar? I like to write down notes on my research”, Jon answered somewhat shyly, he seemed to blush a little bit. Martin had to file that for later, otherwise he would have become a mess as well. Jon allowed him to take the map and just looked elsewhere. Martin stared at the map for a while, but it just made no sense to him. 

“Are you sure this is accurate?” 

“Hmmh yes? Pretty certain”, Jon said defensively. Right. Martin reminded himself that he should sometimes just shut up. 

“Right of course. So I just... It doesn’t make sense. I was lost in the forest for a while, but there is no way I made my way from there”, he showed a point farther away “to where I met you. It looks like a long way and while I did walk a lot, I doubt it was that long in any possible way”, he just rambled a bit panicked. Jon seemed to think for a bit and shrugged. 

“It’s midsummer. Forests don’t quite work like they’re supposed to on midsummer and midwinter. Probably the forest taking pity on you and allowing you to get where you... were meant to be a bit faster”, he explained like it was the most casual, normal thing ever that everyone knew. Martin, instead, blinked at him. Yes, he had heard of some shenanigans with the forest, but he had known that. Jon seemed to realise something and he went pale, abrubtly got up and walked to his bed, laying down very quickly. 

“Goodnight Jon!” Martin wished. His thoughts were racing, he wanted to ask so many questions from Jon, but respected that he had apparently gone to sleep, so he decided to also sleep. 

“Goodnight.” Jon’s answer was quiet, but it still made Martin happy. He could ask Jon the next day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do have some plot for this planned. I will be switching from Jon and Martin's pov, depending on which would fit that chapter better.


	3. Chapter 3

Jon was internally panicking. Of course he had relaxed a bit and let something slip. Now, it wasn’t the biggest thing, but still something most humans shouldn’t know. Maybe he could explain it away with his mapmaking? He was panicking. He didn’t need anyone after him, because he told a random human something they weren’t supposed to know. 

Jon tried to calm himself. Maybe, just maybe, Martin knew about that, or wouldn’t ask questions. He doubted that, but allowed himself a sliver of hope. He shouldn’t allow that. He knew by now that Martin was a curious person, maybe too much for his liking. He liked the man though. It was odd sort of fondness, but Martin seemed like a good human. That was good. Jon liked good humans. 

He winced in pain. Hiding his form was taking a toll on him. Of course he could go longer and was pretty sure that the enchantment would stay while he slept. His head was still pulsing with pain and he felt ache in his muscles. He forced himself to mumble a few words in the Old Tongue, to ease the pain and ensure his form didn’t falter overnight. Then he whispered his prayers and forced himself to fall asleep, into the forgiving darkness full of secrets and lies. 

He awoke early, much earlier than Martin. He let the other one rest and went out, far enough from the road and campsite, that he couldn’t be seen. He let his disguise fall away. The tight feeling of his head smoothed away and he felt so much better. He leaned on a tree and closed his eyes, letting himself absorb the fresh air and hear the beautiful, haunting humming of the trees around him. It was a welcoming sound, greeting him with admiration and respect. It was always warm. He was their warden, they knew it. All his kind warded the woods. Still, he smiled at the trees and gave them a humming response. 

Jon sighed and turned to walk back to Martin. He waved his hand in front of his face and felt the stinging when the illusion landed on top of him again. He wished somewhere in his mind he had not agreed to travel with Martin. He liked Martin, that wasn’t it. He just hated holding up the illusion among humans. He liked the way he looked, when he looked like a warden, but humans tended to freak out and then start asking for things or trying to harm him, so he usually didn’t want them to know. There had been exeption before, of course. 

Jon walked back to the camp to find Martin, looking panicked and scared, eyes darting around, until he noticed Jon and flinched. Jon frowned. 

“I thought you left me!” There was accusation in his voice. Jon felt a sting of shame in his stomach. Right. This was a human, unfit for forests, clinging onto him for help... Was Martin a child? The thought had not crossed his mind. He didn’t look like a child, but... he never knew with humans. 

“Are you a child?” he asked. Martin stared at him for a while, then huffed and seemed to get angry. That confused Jon even more. 

“You’re the one who left without saying a word and now you’re calling me a child!” Martin hissed angrily. Jon blinked. Not a child then. 

“I didn’t mean it like that. I just... Children just usually... cling onto adults and get upset if they’re left alone without explanation... So I just...”. Jon could see Martin get even more offended by the second, so he shut his mouth. This did not go as he intended. 

“Forget it. I'll just keep going by myself!” Martin snapped and started to pack his bag, turning away from Jon, who stared at the human helplessly. He wasn’t too good at talking. He should try, the thought of never seeing Martin again made him feel somewhat uneasy. 

“Look I- I didn’t mean it like that. I just went to check the surroundings to see it was safe to go on.” Jon was halfway lying, but if this human got this upset so easily, something told him not tell Martin much more. He regretted waking up now. 

“Was it? Safe?” 

“Yes.” He hadn’t checked, but the trees had not sung of any danger to him, and he could handle himself even if there was something. Martin might not, but protecting good people was his job, and Martin was good, wasn’t he? At least he deemed him so. 

Martin hesitated with leaving, Jon realised. He had already made sure his stuff was secured, so he just picked them up and just started to walk past Martin, not really turning to look if he followed, but he felt a small smile creep onto his face, as he heard footsteps behind him. 

They had walked a while on the road in silence, which Jon had appreciated, as his head sent stinging waves through his body and the ringing in his ears at times prevented from hearing the forest sing. That silence did not last for too long, as Martin seemed to suddenly get over his anger and remember their talk from the previous night. 

“Hey Jon?” 

“Hmmh?” 

“What was the talk about forests behaving weird this time of year?” 

“I-… I was pretty clear in my words. Sometimes the forests just...”, he gestured around him. “Don’t quite work like on expects them to.” 

“You’re talking like forests have a mind of their own. Like- like they’re living.” Martin said and chuckled nervously. Jon scoffed. 

“Of course they do. They are living, breathing, moving beings. Each tree has a mind of its own and forests do hold their own way of working.” Jon sounded offended, angry. He was offended. The stupidity of humans appalled him. Martin made a weird noise. 

“But... they’re trees. How would they... think? And move? They're rooted in place!” 

“They’re still living. They are tied to their place, but they can still move. Trees don’t think, but they still have a mind and exist, Martin. Trees live, they grow, change and die. Some trees’ minds can be poisoned, or they might rot from inside. Those trees are nasty, and more strong willed than others. You should avoid rotten trees and their rotten minds and rotten will. They often want to harm humans. Trees can do a lot to a unsuspecting human.” Jon was completely calm and serious, when he turned to stare at Martin, who quickly closed his mouth and didn’t say another word for a while. A long while. Talking about rotten trees had made the air heavy, as if the trees around them had shivered. Jon knew the thought was uncomfortable for them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for reading and leaving kudos and comments. I didn't think anyone would really find the story/concept of this interesting, but I really like writing this. The setting is based on a story I want to write sometime. If you want more content from me, I have a Twitter under the same handle, where I occasionally post TMA art.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Martin and Jon talk, Martin has self-deprecating thoughts.

Martin was quiet. His mind was racing and he had a thousand other questions for Jon. It made no sense. Of course he knew trees were living, all plants were, but... he had never thought of them as beings. Did trees have souls? Jon said they didn’t think, and they probably couldn’t talk... He wanted to ask about that from Jon, but something held him back. The sad, serious tone had used when talking about rotten trees... He had certainly not seemed to be kidding. The somber look in his eyes, the tone, the words, it had all sent shivers down his spine. Evil trees didn’t seem too logical, but... Jon talked little, he didn’t seem the type to joke. But still, Martin found it hard to believe. How did Jon even know that? But then again, he had seemingly skipped a huge portion of the forest in his lost wanderings, so the thought of trees moving and deciding where one would end up in, seemed possible but still unsettling somehow. How powerful even were trees? 

Maybe it was because he was thinking so much, or just started to pay attention to the trees, but Martin also noticed the air getting heavy. He almost felt something watching him from behind the trees, but when he turned to look, there was nothing. Could trees watch what someone was doing? Martin suddenly felt very uncomfortable in the forest and near Jon, who still looked solemn and seemed to be lost deep in his thoughts. Martin sighed. This was all very weird and new to him 

They walked and walked and Martin was almost getting suspicious. How much of same looking forest there could be? He still trusted Jon, who didn’t seem the type of person to get lost in any situation. And after Jon’s words Martin did not want to be left alone with the... trees. Why was he so nervous about bloody trees. They were just trees. But they didn’t feel like just trees anymore. They were alike to people to him now. Living. He could almost, at the edges of his hearing, hear quiet whispers. 

“Jon?” 

“What now Martin?” 

“I-… can we set up camp soon? I’m kind of tired.” Martin left the other questions unasked. He would have time later. Something about how different Jon had gone seemed to make him not want to ask questions. He didn’t know if he wanted the answers, the thought of trees being capable of evil had stuck to his mind. He was thinking about the trees near his home, some had sometimes seemed to do pranks, that was true, but he had always thought he was just reaching. They’re trees Martin, they can’t move their roots to trip you, he had thought. But now... 

Jon was screening their surroundings, then tilted his head. The wind seemed to pick up that moment, a humming went through the trees. Jon looked at the wind dance around Jon who didn’t seem to realise it even was there. 

“There is a good camp site little farther way from here”, he said quietly after a while. As he had done so, the wind – and the humming, died down. Martin looked at Jon with the mix of fear and awe, but Jon didn’t seem to notice, or if he did, he pretended not to. Martin just nodded. There was no way Jon was a normal person. Though... maybe that wasn’t such a surprise. 

Martin laid in his makeshift bed and tried to get comfortable on the hard ground. This night’s camp site was tucked away under some trees, that made a great wind proof area. Which was good considering that the wind had picked up again and was running through the forest, bending the trees and dancing on their branches. Something about it seemed like the forest was enjoying itself, Martin had offhandedly said. Jon had looked at him and with a smile had said, that it most certainly was. The nature enjoyed midsummer and it’s magical essence. Martin, this time, had just nodded and gone back to looking at the trees, no longer feeling scary, but caring and stable, as the ancient forest gave them cover from the wind. Martin had decided, that Jon probably could somehow talk to the trees and that the trees liked him. And if the trees liked Jon, and Jon liked Martin, well at least he was *nice* to Martin, most of the time, the moment of being called a child still stung, but if Jon liked Martin, maybe the trees liked him too. 

Martin awoke early again. He was uncomfortable but not really tired, when he woke. Jon was gone, again. Martin hated being abandoned. He could reason now, that Jon probably hadn’t abandoned him and had just gone checking for things, but still, being left alone without a reason or being told made him feel just a little betrayed. Martin almost wanted to go look for Jon in the dim light of the morning, but he could not hear or see anything, that would indicate where he had gone and he did not want to get lost again. 

Martin heard rustling and turned to stare at a fox, who sat atop a rock near him, just staring at him. He froze. Did foxes eat humans? Would the fox harm him? Martin started to back down, when the fox, he could swear, almost looked like it rolled its eyes. That awoke a familiar curiosity inside Martin. The fox did not move, it looked rather relaxed, staring at Martin. 

“Hi? You haven’t seen Jon, have you? I suppose you wouldn’t even know, who Jon is, would you now? And- and you are a fox. Foxes... can’t talk?” Martin felt little silly talking to a fox, but he didn’t want to feel alone. He expected the fox to scare away with that, to realise this was a human and run away, leaving Martin alone again. But it didn’t. It just... Looked at him. It looked slightly amused by Martin’s words, if a fox can look amused. No, it was definetly amused. 

“Jon disappeared again”, Martin tried to defend himself against the smirking animal. The fox made a sound that seemed to imitate a laugh. The fox waved its hand and looked at Martin like it had something to say. It just got up and walked up to Jon’s bed settling down there. When Martin tried to prevent it, that was Jon’s bed, the fox just made a growl and if it had been human, it would have shaken its head. It layed down on Jon’s bed and closed its eyes, and Martin somehow didn’t want to bother it further. Sure, if trees could talk, maybe a particular fox hanging our with him and sleeping on his friend’s... guide’s bed wasn’t the weirdest thing to happen. 

It was well into the morning as the fox awoke. Martin had been reading a book he had packed, when he noticed some movement. The fox was streching. It flicked its ears at Martin, who had been more or less looking at it most of the time it slept. Jon still hadn’t come back. That bothered Martin more. He had tried to keep the worry of having been abandoned (again) in the back of his mind, but it had just grown. What if something had happened to Jon and he needed help? 

The fox seemed to notice his behavior and shook its head. Martin just raised an eyebrow. 

“You know, I have never met a fox that’s quite as odd as you”, he said. He liked the fox now. It was weird but somehow it reminded him of Jon. Martin expected another howl of laughter from the fox, but it had stopped doing whatever it had been doing and just stared at him. You could read the confusion on its face. It blinked slowly, and looked at its paws and then shut its eyes. 

Suddenly there was no fox. Martin blinked and in one second there was a fox and the next there wasn’t. A man sat on the ground. Jon. Jon sat on the ground, muttering something to himself. A thud could be heard as Martin’s book fell on the ground. His jaw was wide open and he just stared at where Jon had appeared. Jon, in the other hand, smiled at Martin. 

“I- apologise. Uhm. I didn’t... I just wanted to run a little”, Jon said in that lovely shy and apologetic tone, that for some reason, made Martin’s stomach drop a little. 

“You- The fox. There was a fox. You? Wha-”, Martin stammered. He tried to wrap his head around the happenings. Jon. The fox. 

“I can... explain?” Jon suggested. Martin closed his mouth and just nodded. Jon ruffled his hair and streched again, before starting. 

“I- I can shapeshift. You... people, normal people would probably call me a magician and-”, Jon started nervously, but got cut off by Martin. 

“You can do magic?” Martin’s voice was excited. Of course he knew about magicians, witches, warlocks, all that. He had just never met someone who was so casual about it. The closest person he had known had been the old hermit seer near his village, who he had feared, as the adults had told him, and all the other kids, that she would give them to the spirits, if they didn’t behave. 

“Yes. I can do some magic, mostly nature related things. And shapeshift. The fox was me. I needed to run and hunt a little bit. I really didn’t notice that I didn’t change back, I swear. Animal mind doesn’t quite work the same as my own. It's all very simple and structured actually. It feels super freeing to... Not think, you know?” Jon explained. 

“Can you show me some magic?” Martin regretted asking that as soon as he had. Of course Jon wouldn’t. Magic was something important and serious and magical people were more important than him, they wouldn’t just do magic because he had asked. Jon seemed a bit taken aback by that, but then smiled. 

“Sure.” He reached his towards the ground and muttered something. He then slowly pulled back his hand and small flower seemed to be pulled from the ground and bloomed. It was tiny, white starshaped flower. Martin gasped. That was amazing. His eyes were shining. Jon had just made a flower, just like that, in the ground. 

“Can you actually talk to trees?” was Martin’s next question. 

“Technically. They don’t really... talk. At least in a way you count as talking. I can communicate with them, yes. I talk to them, ask wordless questions and they answer. It's all very complicated, or at least it sounds like that, when you try to explain it. For me it comes almost as naturally as breathing.” 

“Oh, alright. That is so interesting. I never thought of trees like that... Is that what you’ve been listening to? The trees talking?” 

“Oh- uh. You noticed. I'm actually impressed by that. Yes and no. I have occasionally asked, if there is danger, or something of note, but most of the time I’ve been listening to the trees sing. It's quite the nice sound.” 

“Can you teach me? How to hear trees sing and make flowers bloom and all that? Or at least a little?” Martin was excited, but kicked himself inwardly, as he saw Jon’s reaction to the question. He stiffened and froze. Of course he won’t, you idiot. He is an important, talented man, and you are worthless and useless and not talented in magic, why would he waste his time. 

“I... Most of this is... family practise, Martin. We don’t really... initiate outsiders. And I don’t even know if you have the knack for this type of magic. Your gifts may lay elsewhere. But. But what I can do, is teach you how to listen to the trees sing, that is no secret.” Jon said carefully. Martin felt like something was melting inside him, something that had taken a rough grip of him. 

“That would be lovely! But- uh, Jon, what do you mean by my gifts?” He didn’t have any gifts. 

“Oh that. Everyone is talented at something, Martin. Someone makes a good smith, someone a good teacher, someone else is a great leader. Same comes to magic. Everyone has the ability to learn magic, if they try hard enough. Each person has a different area of magic they’re naturally inclined towards. Transmutation, elemental magic, spirit magic and so on. Your natural gift may not be nature magic, as mine is.” Jon explained. Martin thought about that. He doubted he had any natural magical gifts, he didn’t, he wasn’t stupid. But Jon seemed so sure about that and he did know more than Martin about these things, clearly. But still, he couldn’t believe he would be good at magic of all things. 

“I can help you with discovering, where your soul likes to bend, magic wise. Or at least help you to start. Magic isn’t an easy thing.” Jon sounded so supportive, Martin didn’t have the heart to tell him that he would be wasting his time. 

“Sure. Can you teach me to listen to the trees now?” he said instead and Jon nodded, clearly excited and started to explain to Martin what he should do. 

It took them the rest of the morning and into the day until Martin could hear faint singing at the edge of his mind. Every time he closed his eyes it got a bit louder, only to go faint again, when he opened them. He did enjoy the songs though. He made a mental note, that the song sounded like a thousand different voices singing in harmony, but still it sounded like it came from one source. He and Jon walked together in silence, both listening to the harmonies of the forest, both quite happy to have a new friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want everyone to know Im aromantic, so I have absolutely zero idea how to write believable romance. I'll be doing my best. I've been wanting to get to chapter 5/6 bc Feral Jon rights. I don't know if Feral Jon is in part 5 or 6 but I cant wait to write that.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Protective Jon mode: activated

Jon was happy. Martin had taken everything exceptionally well. He had been interested in what Jon had to say and been into it, wanting to know more. Jon had not sensed any ill intention from Martin, only genuine curiosity and awe. He had noted that Martin had seemed surprised to hear that he had gifts for magic as well, but then again most people found it surprising. Martin had been fascinated though. Jon had pushed back the thoughts that he might be used, he did not want to believe his friend would use him like that. Humans were unpredictable but Jon wanted to believe he had found a good one. Martin was funny and nice and smart and fun to be around. Jon rarely met people he took a proper liking to, but when he did, he had high respect for them. He hadn’t expected for Martin to hear the forest sing so easily. It had come natural to him, when he was a child. But humans, most humans wouldn’t grasp the intricacies of listening to something without a voice as easily as Martin had. But it hadn’t taken long and Jon had been able to see the wonder in his eyes as he had first heard it. It was beautiful, he knew it. He had only met one other human who had managed to succeed in learning to listen. He smiled at the memory of Georgie, fierce but caring human he had known. He missed her at times. 

Georgie had taught him a lot about humans when had been younger, in his twenties and new to the world. He had told Georgie about himself and his world and had been overjoyed that she had respected it, even if she hadn’t properly understood most of it. Not that she had been too interested in finding out about how his kind guarded the forest, what type of trees had the best personalities and all the other bits that belonged in Jon’s world. She had learned to listen after days of trying. Jon had to give her that. She was stubborn and strong willed and had learned, even when it wasn’t easy. 

Martin was different. He seemed so interested in Jon’s world. He had soaked up his every word and really seemed to enjoy and want to know more. It made something in Jon very happy. 

Jon and Martin followed the path out of the forest. They were on top of a hill and could see fields beneath them and then a town. Jon knew it was Raingrove. He liked visiting it. The town wasn’t too big, but the people were respectful to him and he always had fun there. 

“So that’s it? What was it, Rain-something?” Martin asked. Jon nodded. There was some way to go but they would make it before nightfall. He sighed. He had enjoyed the cover of the forest, his home. He didn’t particularly like human lands too much. They were all so empty and well known and everything had to have a meaning. Humans were like that. They had all the right to be who they were, did Jon like it or not. 

Jon felt the exhaustion in his bones, as he walked towards the city wall. The gatewatch was standing outside the gate, smoking, as always. Jon waved at him from the distance. He wasn’t sure if the man recognized him from so far. Jon's head was hurting again. 

“Hello Jon, nice to see you again”, the gatewatch said, as they got close. Jon nodded as a greeting. 

“Ricko’s is having some great deals and The Green Apple just got a new delivery of apple cider, the good kind.” 

“Thank you, Connor. I'll go have a look.” Jon said tiredly. Some apple cider sounded amazing to him. They headed towards The Green Apple, a local inn Jon always liked to visit. Martin followed him silently. 

They had slept in the inn for the night. Jon had barely gotten any sleep. That was alright, he didn’t need sleep anyways. Not as much as humans, in any event. He would sleep later. His head was throbbing in pain and Jon wished beyond everything he could just remove the illusion, but these were humans, he could not risk himself – and them, like that. He was half in a daze as he and Martin did some shopping around, buying more food and other important things. Jon barely noticed anything really for half the day and when he came back to himself they were already far from the town. Martin had seemed to realise, that Jon wasn’t all there, not quite alright, and after Jon had snapped at him that he was perfectly fine, thank you, Martin hadn’t really said anything. Jon felt a little bad for him. He tried to ease his headache by tuning to the humming of the trees, but it just felt like crackling in his head. 

“Hey Jon, I know you said you were fine, but you don’t *look* fine, you look sick, and we can stop, if you want”, Martin said, quietly, after fidgeting with his hands for a while, clearly worried. 

“I am fine, Martin. We can keep going”, Jon muttered. He did not feel fine in the least. Resting sounded nice. 

“No, youre not. And no, we are not keeping going until I actually believe you feel fine”, Martin said firmly, pressing a hand on Jon’s shoulder to stop him. The gesture felt nice. Jon wanted to lean into the touch. He sighed. Maybe Martin was right. 

“Fine, fine. If we keep going for an hour or so, there is a good camp place there. We'll stop there.” he stated firmly and weakly pushed past Martin, who he could tell was shaking his head, but followed, seemingly understanding, that he couldn’t change Jon’s mind on this. 

When they finally stopped, Jon was glad. He was tired. Really tired. His head was in pain, the weight of the illusion snapping in his head, like tight strings. 

“There’s a brook little way there, if we need water”, Jon informed Martin. Martin was watching him worriedly, but nodded. Jon sat down on the soft forest floor. The trees above him were singing of rain and wind, a promise of storm. 

“Do you mind... if I’m not human for a little bit?” Jon asked mid yawn. Martin was trying to light a fire, Jon noted as a smile creeped onto his face. Humans were so adorable sometimes. 

“Whatever you need to be comfortable”, Martin answered without even thinking about it. Jon's heart skipped a beat. Oh if only Martin knew... 

Then he wasn’t thinking anymore, as he was in a form of a fox. His tiny fox head felt some tingling, but otherwise he was content. He was hungry and a tired, nothing what a fox should be. Human was near him, human didn’t intend to harm it. Human would give it food after it had rested. It could rest now. It's tiny paws were tired and it needed them strong and rested. It's pelt was messy, it noted, as it walked towards the human. It pressed against the human, humming in its tiny mind. This human was a nice one. It yawned, then pressed its head on its paws. The human would keep watch for it. Fire was crackling very nicely. 

When the fox awoke, sun had started to set already. It was laying next to the human. The human was nice and soft, warm. 

“Oh you woke!” the human made some noices, that took a while for the fox to understand, but it nodded. Oh how soft the human was. He liked the human. A thought, a small intention, creeped into its mind, and it did as it felt like doing, why think about it, what was there to think? The fox got up and jumped into the humans lap, crawled into a ball and closed its eyes. Yes, that was very pleasant. The human made some sort of noices. Where those good noices? It decided they were. After a little while a hand touched its pelt. Oh? Human was touching it. Did the human want to pet it? It leaned into the hand a little. The human continued carefully. The fox had a thought, that it should be embarrassed, but why? This was nice. 

The fox was happy and content, though it was hungry. It needed to eat soon. Maybe it would go hunt. Hunting sounded nice. Hunting in the night. Yes, very pleasant. 

“I’m going to the brooke to get us some water, if you don’t mind too much?” the human talked again. The fox just nodded and got up. It watched the human disappear into the dusk. It felt uneasy suddenly. Something was wrong. It wished it could hear the singing of the trees better but the humming through the leaves was now worried, quick, like a warning. Warning? Of what, to who? The fox could hear speech somewhere far, coming closer. Panic lit up in its tiny heart. The human? Would it be in danger? Everywhere around it the trees were singing a silent yes. 

Jon rushed after Martin. It was easy for him, to stay silent and hidden and at the same time run through the trees. He Knew something was wrong, could hear the cruel laughter just out of his vision. As he reached the last trees before the brook, he took a breath and allowed himself to open his Eyes to See what was going on. There were three riders, circling Martin, who was standing in the brook. 

“What are you doing here at this time?” one of them laughed, voice twisted in a mocking tone. The other two joined in on the laugh. Jon could feel his heart beat faster and panic set into him. 

“Don’t you know there is unsavory people out in the woods?” a second one asked, stopping his horse to stare at Martin with a cruel smile. 

“It is dangerous to be alone, who knows what could happen”, a third one said, cruelty covering every bit of the words, twisted smile on his scarred face and inhumane joy in his eyes. They were going to hurt Martin. That wasn’t allowed. 

“He isn’t alone!” Jon’s voice was loud and strong, without a trace of fear. The men turned around to look at him, about to mock the newcomer, what was it going to do, but they froze. What stood behind them was not human. It had too many eyes, all glowing green. Antlers grew out of its skull, sharp and majestic, crowning the face that stared back at them with six pairs of eyes. It was taking support on a tree, hands ending in sharp claws. You could almost see spikes from its hands. It reminded a human in shape, but it was deeply unsettling. Air was rattling around it and suddenly the deafening, angry, dangerous silence covered the forest. One of the men would have screamed, if the forest had not stolen the sound before it left his lips. The trees all seemed to bend over towards the men, stones seemed suddenly sharper, as if everything had suddenly become alive and hostile towards them. Like a thousand angry creatures had stared at them, ready to strike if they ever made a move. 

“I don’t recommend angering the forest.” Jon’s voice was cold, the sensation of the voice was like stones being ground against each other. 

“I recommend you leave and never come back.” It was an order, delivered with such a tone, that it seemed to set the men’s mind aflame with fear, nothing but a need to get out, to not drown in the trees, need to get out. The horses felt it too, bolting like crazy, out of the water and towards the road, to get out of the cursed, dark forest. Jon knew they would never find a way and what lurked in the dark would feast on them. The forest obeyed the commands it was given. Jon felt powerful. He could feel the forest in the beating of his heart. How every single tree would stand by him, how every single plant and rock would bend to his will, if needed. A grateful smile had risen up on his face. It had been long time since he had allowed the forest to run this deep in his veins. Then he realized Martin was staring at him, still standing in the water and his smile died. There was such a look of fear on his face. Jon wanted to run, to cry, to hide. He was frozen still, however.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A look into a more accurate look of Jon. Wonder how Martin will react...


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Martin is mean

Martin had thought that falling into three men who clearly had had evil intentions was bad enough, but then this monster had just appeared. Martin had not known if he would have rather been killed by the men or the monster. Its eyes were *glowing*. And it had twelve eyes on its face, all full of fury and anger, pure, primal rage. Its voice had been calm however, which had just terrified Martin more. And it had sounded like Jon. It *looked* like Jon, in a perverted way. It had same color eyes and a similar face and body, if all the horrifying editions didn’t count. Then the forest had changed and Martin was pretty sure he could never again feel safe anywhere where there was trees. It had felt like the trees would get up any moment and step on him, like the trees hated him and wanted him to suffer, to be gone, that they would extend their roots towards him and strangle him or pull him underground. He was pretty certain he would die horrifically. As the creature had told them to leave, he had wanted to run away. He could barely breathe from fear, he was shaking, his vision was blurry. 

The water was cold. He was alone with the creature. He would die now. He tried to look at the creature, he didn’t want to die blind. Any minute now, the roots would rise and strangle him, or the creature would slash him to pieces and eat him or- 

“Are you alright?” The voice was much more Jon this time. Martin stared to the bank, where Jon stood. Not a monster covered in eyes and horrific other features. Martin was pretty sure he had seen roots crawling by the creature- Jon's feet. No, Jon looked at him, worried. It wasn’t Jon. Jon wasn’t like that. Jon was *human*. 

Was he though? A small voice inside Martin’s head reminded him that Jon could turn into a fox. He was Jon still then. But fox was easy to accept, they were relatively harmless. They weren’t monsters with twelve eyes and such a crushing power. Martin wanted to just run off. That was not, could not, be Jon. It was something trying to trick him. 

“Martin?” The thing asked with Jon’s voice. It sent shivers down Martin’s back. He needed to get away from him-it. He didn’t let himself notice the sadness in the voice. 

“Stay away from me!” he could hear himself yelling, somehow gaining control of his body again. He turned and ran, in the other direction, as far as he could. He hoped he wasn’t running to his doom. Some part of his brain told him that running in the dark was such a stupid idea. He did not care. 

He did not know how long he had run, or how far. He didn’t even know, if the monster had followed him. He remembered Jon’s words about the forest controlling the people going through it and the paths they would take. Could the monster control that as well? He fell down against a rock, heavily panting. His lungs were burning and any amount of air felt too little, he needed more, he wanted to drink air like cold water. He sat there, letting his breathing even out, digging his hands into his face and crying silently. Was this his fate, to die in these unknown woods? He couldn’t even run away properly, he did not have his things. He would never make it in the forest alone. And even if he made it to human civilisation without the monster catching him... what then? It clearly wasn’t human. Maybe it could command the whole forest, watch him through every single tree? He shivered. 

By the time he was calm enough to think about what to do next, he had picked the skin of his hands raw. The forest felt different now, almost comforting. The trees seemed to breathe with kindness and he could hear their humming song carry words of comfort and safety, promises of him being safe and looked after. He wanted to believe it. 

He allowed himself to think about the possibility of the monster being Jon. Jon hadn’t wanted to hurt him, at least not seemingly. Maybe Jon would let him leave. Say thank you for your help, but I cannot go on with a monster like you. Jon would probably understand. If it wasn’t Jon... it would get to him anyways. If it was, he could go get his stuff and maybe make out. 

He had decided. He didn’t know where he was, but tried to walk back the way he had come. He didn’t have any idea where he had come, but it didn’t seem to matter. He could almost sense the paths twisting and moving, guiding him back. It took a lot shorter time to walk back. Martin didn’t care about that. He just wanted out of this cursed forest. He wanted to be free again. He would move to the city and never leave. 

Soon Martin was at the brook again and walked the path upwards towards the campsite. He could see a warm light glowing from there. He stood in the shadows a moment, before stepping into the light, just observing Jon, who sat there, staring at the fire dancing. His gaze was empty. Martin could feel pity move in his chest. Jon looked so guilty and sad, a tear glistening in the air. Martin took a step. Jon raised his gaze. 

“I’m just here to pick up my things”, Martin said. His voice was raw and he could barely get the words out. Jon just nodded. 

“They’re over there, I packed them in case you’d come back”, Jon answered, voice empty, stable. He did not look at Martin. For some reason this angered Martin. How could Jon be so uncaring and emotionless? 

“So you just, what, packed my things? Happy to get rid of me?” he spit at Jon’s face, who still didn’t look at him. 

“I guessed – correctly, that you would want to leave after that. You can just take your things and go, you get to be on your way faster that way.” 

“You did that for what then? To get me to leave? So you don’t have to feel guilt for abandoning me?” Martin was almost yelling. He had been so scared and Jon had the audacity to act so calm. Like nothing had happened. 

“They were going to kill you. Torture you to death, Martin. I didn’t want you to die. It’s really that simple”, Jon answered, finally looking at Martin with red eyes, wet from clearly crying. They made eyecontact for a second, before Jon turned his eyes back to his hands. 

“You scared me to death!” 

“I-… I tried to direct all of it towards the others. I couldn’t shield you from it, believe me, I tried.” Jon sounded tired. He looked very small, not scary at all. How could Jon look like that kind of monster. He looked so human. Martin sat next to a tree, opposite of Jon and quite the way away from him. The clutched his bag. 

“Explain”, he commanded, not even considering the fact that ordering Jon like that could be dangerous. No, it isn’t Jon. That is not allowed to be Jon, it’s the monster. 

“What?” 

“Explain yourself. Who- no, what are you, what happened, everything!” Martin tried to stop his voice from shaking, from fear... or hatred? He didn’t care. He wanted answers. 

“I... I can do that. At least. I suppose...”, Jon mumbled, still avoiding looking at Martin. Part of Martin wanted to hug him- it, but he forced himself to be still and stare at... Jon. 

“I... well I am not a human...”, Jon started, but Martin immediatly interrupted him, coldly. 

“That has been noticed. And on that topic, I’d appreciate if you didn’t try to masquarade as one, it is quite unbecoming of you, to try to use a form that is not yours to lure everyone into a false sense of security.” Jon blinked at him, you could see him flinch at the words, how sadness filled his eyes, only two. He sighed deeply, looking very small and defeated. Martin almost felt bad for his words, almost, but then again, Jon was not human. He looked at it expectantly. Jon nodded and waved his hand in the air. 

Something seemed to distort, air seemed to bend a little and there he was. This form, this one was still different. Martin wondered how many forms Jon could take. There wasn’t much monstrous about him, no twelve eyes, no sharp claws, no pressure from the forest, but he clearly wasn’t human. His eyes seemed to hold patterns and knowledge, like time itself. His ears were a lot longer and pointier, something about him radiated this aura of not quite human. And he had antlers. They weren’t huge like the monster had had, but they were there. A clear sign of not human. 

“Stop trying to convince me that you look this nice!” Martin snapped at Jon, who looked at him confused. 

“This *is* what I look like”, he answered. His voice was tired, like he just wanted to sleep. It was quite late, sun would start to rise soon. 

“I saw you! I am not a fool!” Martin was yelling again. Jon gave him a glare to shut him up. 

“If you’d let me explain, as you so begged for it.” Jon raised an eyebrow and waited for Martin to shut his mouth. 

“Thank you. Now, as I was saying, I am not a human. I am a spirit. More specifically a forest spirit, one of the more powerful kind. I belong to a line of forest spirits descended straight from our great lord Silvius, the high king and god of wilderness. Lord Silvius has degreed my kind to guarding the forest, as well as taking care of all their inhabitants, trees, animals and spirits alike, and protecting them. We clean it, we look after it, we make the sacrifices necessary to keep everything alive. Sometimes we need to travel, like I am now doing. We allow illusions to hide away our true nature, as humans tend to get violent or scared, when they are in our presence”, Jon explained, calmly. A hint of pride could be noticed in Jon’s voice, he clearly was proud to be what he was. 

“I saw you! You looked like a monster!” Martin protested, but with some respect in his voice. He didn’t want to anger someone of Jon’s caliber now, that his brain was allowing him to be reasonable again. 

“I am allowed to take that form, that is true. It is, however, my true nature or form. My kind simply can allow the inherent energy of the forest enter ourselves for short periods of time, when we gain control over everything in our forests. It is to keep us, and other inhabitants, safe from outside forces. It usually works, most people are not dumb enough to try to stand against the beating heart of the forest, they can see it’s a losing battle.” 

Martin didn’t say anything for a while. He felt terrible. He had... he had been so cruel to Jon. Downright awful. He had been afraid, but that still did not excuse him. Jon wasn’t a monster. Jon wasn’t a monster. It was wrong of him. 

“I’m sorry Jon. For everything I said... I am sorry”, Martin said. He needed to apologize. It wouldn’t make things alright or erase anything, but he needed Jon to know he was sorry. Jon looked at him now, eyes flushed with confusion and gratefulness. 

“Thank you”, he answered. Jon didn’t say much after that, and soon there was no Jon, just a fox, who crawled into a ball, still staying far away from Martin, not looking at him. It made Martin’s heart ache. He had fucked up and badly. Martin leaned against a tree. Would it be better if he just kept going alone? That probably wouldn’t help. Maybe Jon would talk more in the morning after waking up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author does not feel bad. You get treated with two chapters this close together.


End file.
